Angel
by Crime Scene Fairy
Summary: Sometimes, it seemed to her that falling into darkness would be better than everything that she was doing. And then, she remembers him. Atton/Exile


**Summary:** Sometimes, it seemed to her that falling into darkness would be better than everything that she was doing. And then, she remembers him.

**Pairings:** Exile/Atton

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Knights of the Old Republic, or Atton Rand. I'm working on owning Atton, though. I do own my version of the Exile, Arica Wyatt, and the plot of this.

**Author's Note:** UGH! Apparently, I put on my GX fic on here! Idiotic me!

Angel

She could remember the first time that they had met with clear precision - he was standing in the cell, looking a little surprised to see her, yet smirking at the fact that she was half naked. She had been surprised to see anyone alive in that Force forsaken facility, and wary of the warning Kreia had given her through the Force.

But, as she had learned very soon, he wasn't even half as bad as Kreia had made him out to be. A bit of a rascal, perhaps, and maybe a bit of an idiot, but a brave, strong, and loyal idiot. And one that she respected, no matter what anybody else said. He was someone she could trust… and the one person who had waited for her in that damned cave on Korriban.

Ever since they had landed on Korriban, dark, horrible, painful thoughts had made their home in her mind. And it scared her more than anything, because she was tempted to do the things the thoughts in her head told her to do. And she knew that the rest of the crew was no better - Mical was pale. Bao-Dur jumped at the slightest movements. Mira had been sharpening that damned vibroblade like crazy. And Atton…

Atton had barely said a word to her after they landed on Korriban.

Which only confirmed to her this - those same dark thoughts had made their home in Atton's head, as they had with her own. However, it was opposite - while her own thoughts tried to influence her to take down Atton before he betrayed her, his own thoughts were telling him to take her down before she could do the same to her.

And she knew why. They were each other's lifelines, one of the only things holding them to sanity.

She had learned about his past during their time on Nar Shaddaa. She had been shocked - even horrified at the tales he had told her, but had been honored at the trust he had in her. And she had surprised him when she told him of the worst memory she had. After he had told her his story, she had told him of the Mandalorian Wars.

Of Malachor - her personal Hell, the reason why everything had happened this way.

She trusted everybody on the _Ebon Hawk_. That didn't mean that everyone else trusted each other. Bao-Durr didn't trust Canderous as far as he could throw him. Mira didn't trust Atton. Atton didn't trust Mical. No one trusted Kreia other than herself. No one trusted - or liked - Goto. While they found HK amusing, no one really trusted him. Everyone trusted T3.

She was really the only one who trusted everyone, and the one person who everyone trusted. But, out of all of those people, she had realized that she trusted Atton the most. He had gone with her to everything they had dealt with in the past - he had gone with her to the Jedi Enclave. He had helped her prepare Khoonda for the assault against the mercenaries, and he had saved her life during it.

The one thing that she couldn't understand, however, was how she had ended up falling for him - and why, for that matter. She was a former general, someone who made friends easily… or made enemies easily. He was sarcastic, bitter, but extremely loyal and brave at times.

So, she found it somewhat ironic when she thought about it and realized that they were a good pair. He could help her by holding her up, and she could help him by making sure that she did not get killed.

But, it was easy to realize that they were each other's lifelines. They made sure that the other one stayed sane. After the Force had been awakened in Atton on Nar Shaddaa, the call to the Dark Side had come to him, nearly turning him. She, however, had managed to stop him from falling completely, catching him before he had been gone for good.

And he had gone after her right away on Nar Shaddaa when Goto had kidnapped her. Using the very limited Force powers he had, he, Visas, Canderous, and Mira had blown their way to the ship… before blowing it up and dealing with a pair of Twi'leks that Atton had not been happy to see.

But he had gone after her. And she would have done the same thing for her in a heartbeat.

Now, sitting in the engine room of the _Ebon Hawk_, the Jedi Exile sighed as she thought all of those thoughts. They were leaving Korriban, at last. At last, they were leaving that hell. She had hated that place more than anything.

Especially the tomb.

Seeing Malak again… she had forgotten how pompous Malak had been. Though, it had been funny to be so sarcastic and cynical to him during the vision. And then the vision of the commander and her troops on Dxun…

And then the last two - the two visions that had truly shook her to the core.

Kreia, Atton, Mical, Bao-Dur, and T3 had all been there. Where HK, Canderous, and Mira had been, along with Visas, she had no clue. But it had been horrifying. While Everyone had disappeared within several seconds, the Exile had seen Atton's e yes, and had realized something in that one moment.

That Atton truly had darkness in him, and that it could someday end up being his downfall.

If she couldn't be his parachute, anyway.

The Exile looked up as she heard footsteps come towards her, and was surprised to see that it was Atton. He hesitated as he entered, and then cocked his head at her as he came closer. A lightsaber was clipped to his belt - and the Exile knew that there was an orange blade to it, one that he had made himself.

"You alright, Arica?" he asked hesitantly, crossing his arms across his chest.

The Exile nodded. "Fine, Atton." She paused. "What about you?"

She knew what had been going on in his head during their trip to Korriban. He knew what had been going on in hers. And right now, they needed the other more than anything.

"Better, now that we've gotten off that damned rock." He shook his head, and the Exile realized that he had lost weight on the planet. She had, too.

"Amen to that," she replied quietly, standing up. She took several steps closer to him, looking up. He was a good eighteen centimeters taller than her, and she had to look up to meet his beautiful brown eyes.

"Can you make me a promise that we'll never go to this rock again?" he asked, cocking his head.

She laughed shortly. "I promise. Not exactly looking forward to going back to Dxun, though… Kelborn didn't sound to happy in that message."

Atton nodded in agreement, and the two fell silent. It was not an uncomfortable silence - it was a silence where they both just needed each other's presence for a moment or two.

And then, she leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.

He put a hand on her shoulder blade and pulled her closer to him, stroking her long, dark brown hair. A moment was spent in perfect harmony, and for that moment, nothing else existed in the universe. There weren't any Sith trying to kill them. They weren't heading to civil war.

They were just standing in engine room, kissing, letting themselves have the perfect moment.

Then, of course, Canderous had to ruin it.

"Rand!" barked the voice of the Mandalore. "We need you in the cockpit - we're about to reach Dxun!"

Atton stopped the kiss reluctantly, and looked down at the Exile, who stared back up at him. They continued that way for a moment more, and then Atton let her go. Backing away slowly and sadly, he turned and left the room.

The Exile walked him leave, breathless, and then put a hand to her lips, where Atton had kissed her. She sighed, and then looked down, her gaze reaching the double-bladed lightsaber resting on her hips. And then, she knew.

There would be times that she would want to fall in the next few weeks. Times where she would nearly fall.

But, she knew now that if she thought of Atton, she would be fine.

He was her angel.

And she loved him. She loved her angel.

Shaking her head, the Exile left the room, heading towards the cockpit, where the rest of the crew was looking upon the moon of Dxun. But she knew one thing.

Her angel would keep her from falling.

One way, or another.


End file.
